bear with me

i turned on the radio tonight- an old habit that i kept under my covers for a pretty long time. all because i needed some company. familiar tunes came out from that little grey machine and i'm settling into the night with much ease.

i was there at the airport today, without my passport. and of cos, no air ticket. i was there to witness the departure of my dear friends who were all geared up for the taipei trip. all smiley faces and eyes gleaming with excitment. i remembered when we were still in the midst of our terrifying assignments last sem when i suggested that we should make taipei our Holiday destination. yabble dabble and yeaa. truth's out- i did all the talking and nothing's happening on my side here. My Da-dee said No! and therefore i've been cut out from the trip.
Looking at them walk through the custom gates today, i felt hurt. i felt so strongly about how i'm missing out all the fun that they're about to experience in the Next 8 Days or so. i love them so much that i wanna go play with them. you know how it feels? Do you KNOW?!

and yeaa as i was saying this is one of the many things that have been so difficult for me to take it in my stride and live with it. HOW can i? it's so difficult. i feel absolutely embarassed whenever i'm out with them and i have to go home Once i receive that "YOU BETTER BE HOME" phone call. it just sucks awfully. I want so much to rebel but i know it's not right. deep down i know the Obey your parents portion... but having to live with this is suberply awful. urgh. okay i just can't explain it.

and. weird things have all been happening.
ooos. i'm preparing myself for the 2nd plunge.
when they return with the all so Wonderful photos of Taiwan. and i know i will feel the hurt again. bye.

{ 1:14 am }